Thursday, September 26, 2013

A high school acquaintance of mine, Jerilyn McDermed, recently posted on Facebook her reply to a September 19, 2013 Wall Street Journal article by Kevin Helliker titled "The Slowest Generation"calling out what he refers to as today's slowest generation. I also read his article and felt moved to share my thoughts with him. I sent him the email below. It by no means sets him straight like Jer did with her powerful and inspiring personal testimony. With her permission I am sharing it with you here. I encourage you to read his article first and then read her response below.


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Jer McDermed's response:

"Dear Mr. Helliker,

I recently had the privilege of stumbling upon your recent article titled 'The Slowest Generation' through a friend on Facebook. As I settled in to read the article, the phrase short-sighted and narrow-minded sprang to mind, perhaps with a sprinkling of the word elitist.

While I applaud your Bostonian pace and the hard work that you put in as a runner to place in your age group, rest assured that I too, will win my age group one day. Most likely when I am 85 and everybody else in my age group is sitting in the nursing home and playing bingo. You see, Mr. Helliker, I am part of this so-called 'Slowest Generation' that lacks competitive spirit. However, I am writing today to tell you that you are wrong. While it may seem that this slow generation lacks competition or doesn't want to put in the hours of training in order to run 8-9 minute miles, one must look past numbers and at the runners before making a declaration that they're just not competitive.

Case in point:



Meet Jerilyn. This is me in 2009. Every time that I wake up at 3:30 in the morning to go for a run and bust out what you may believe are mediocre miles (Usually 5 miles at about 14:50 pace; sometimes faster, sometimes slower), I am competing. Every time that I sign up for a race, I am signing up for a competition. Every time I toe up to the back of that pack, because I will never see a day where I can toe up to the blue line before the gun goes off, I'm still competing. Jerilyn? the old me? That's who I am competing with. Every minute of every day of every hour, I am competing with genetics, family history, a life long eating disorder, and her- the girl who weighed 350 pounds who couldn't so much as play with her children without getting short of breath. You know what? I'm winning.

The picture on the right is me now. That picture on the left is from November 17, 2012. It was after I had completed my very first marathon. Well, a marathon plus. I say that because I put in 28 miles after getting lost on the course. I got lost on the course because I was so incredibly slow (though meeting the required pace for the race, I was the only one doing it) that they left me and pushed me to the sidewalk. I stood at crosswalks, I waited for traffic, and I picked up an extra 1.8 miles along the way. My race bib is ripped because after they told me that my race was done at mile 14, I tried to rip the d-tag off the back of it so that my time would still reflect that I finished the race when I crossed the finish line. After using some unsavory language and continuing without the blessing of the race officials, I ended up stuffing the whole bib in my pocket until mile 18 when I discovered that there were still 50K runners behind me. For the last 8.2 miles of my marathon, I cried. I cried tears of joy, tears of disbelief. Here I was, 250+ pounds, behind every body else, and I was going to be a marathoner. I finished dead last in 7:28. If I could choose between wining the whole thing because running just comes naturally to me, or coming in dead last because every moment of it was a struggle, an internal competition with what my body thinks I should be- I would be dead last all over again. A million times over.

 To date, I have completed more 5Ks than I can count, a handful of 10Ks, 2 sprint triathlons, 6 half marathons, and a full marathon. I am the president of a run club that I established during my marathon training that boasts approximately 100 active members and 475 members that follow the closed group on Facebook. I suffered a torn ACL in March and had a full ACL reconstruction done on April 9, 2013. It took me 5 weeks to get back to walking my first 5K and much to the chagrin of my doctor, I began training for a half marathon on July 8th. At a check up for my knee, my surgeon could not believe that I was only 5 months post op and his physicians assistant told me that I have done better in my recovery than most high school and college kids. I run my first half marathon next Saturday, September 28th, 5 and a half months after having my ACL repaired. If that isn't a competitive spirit, I'm not certain what that is.

I began running in 2009 and I can tell you that in 4 short years, I have gone from feeling as if I did not belong to feeling as if there's a movement towards something better. I see people that are like me. I see men, women, and children of all sizes toeing up to the back of that pack on a Saturday morning when they'd be sleeping in or consuming an unhealthy breakfast. I see them competing with those same inner demons that I do, and you know what? They are winning, Mr. Helliker.

We are a slow generation. But you know what? We have more grit, more dedication, and way more competitive spirit than the runners of the olden days have ever had. Our race is simply more important than your random Saturday morning triathlon because ours is the race of a lifetime.

With respect,

Jerilyn McDermed"

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Here is my email to the writer:

"Dear Mr. Helliker,

God forbid we let the un-natural born athletics believe that they can brush elbows with elite runners! Soon everyone will think they can get moving and what then?! Maybe a healthier society? Oh my, the horror!  

I think you've forgotten it was your generation that raised the slowest generation. Maybe your parent's generation is shaking their finger at you for creating the issues we fight? Just a thought. 

Every generation thinks the next is going in the crapper. Just sounds like the same quibble of "In my day, I walked 5 miles in the snow with no shoes..." heard from our grandparents with a new spin. Agreed "fun runs" are a trend of the now, however your article sounds like a case of crotchety old man syndrome.  I'd get that checked out before it colors all of your writing and makes you no longer relevant. 

My Regards,
Sarah Lee of Raleigh, NC and member of Generation Slow"

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UPDATE!! 
Here is Mr. Helliker's response to my email:

Ms. Lee,


Thanks for writing. I’d guess that when an old-timer says something about “kids these days,” the joke pretty much always is on the old timer.


Sincerely,

Kevin Helliker

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Special thanks to you Jer for allowing me to share this with my readers! You are truly a brave, strong and inspirational woman! 
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Friday, September 20, 2013

1. PlanetBox

A friend of mine shared these with me recently.  I don't really have a need for them now.  I don't take lunches to work as I am a SAHM.  I already have a ton of snack carrying options right now so I don't think I want to invest in the snack size one.  However, I do like the idea of "greener" options for when the kids start school and take their lunch.  I really like the portion control and love the magnets for the kids to personalize their own box.  Also the carry cases look pretty durable themselves.



2. Fun Runs

OK so even if you are not into the current marathon running fad many people have found a middle ground in "Fun Runs".  These are usually a 5K which is 3.1 miles and they throw in a wacky theme to help you forget that you are excising.  These are great excuses for adults to take a break from stresses and reality with their friends or co-workers.  Some involve costumes!  Quoting "Olivia" the pig from my kids cartoons "Whatever the question, Costumes are always a good answer." So far I have only attempted to run in the Color Vibe 5K where they throw color on you as you run.  I am anticipating an awesome girl's night with my old high school friends running in the Bad Prom 5k early this October.  Some have even used these fun runs or run/walks as fundraisers.  No matter the motivation I highly recommend jumping in and participating in this new trend no matter what your physical fitness level may be currently because it can only improve from getting moving.

Tip: If running ain't your normal tup of tea and you are looking for cheap running clothes that you don't mind getting trashed at these runs, check Wal-Mart. I got spandex shorts, running shorts to go over them, a new sports bra and fun tall running socks with neon accents very inexpensive for the Color Run. And they carry plus sizes!!! :)
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Thursday, September 19, 2013

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Tuesday, September 17, 2013


Eight years ago today we stood on the Carolina coast and said I Do. Today we stand on the same coast as a family and We Still Do. Thank you for being the one that cuts my burdens in half and doubles every joy. For meaning the vows you said about good times, bad times, in sickness & in health. I've set you apart. Always remember there was nothing worth sharing...Like the love that let us share our name. Glory to God!!!

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Friday, September 13, 2013

This Friday my Faves are pretty pic-explanatory.

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Wednesday, September 11, 2013

This morning the kids and I observed the 9/11 moment of silence with the news cast. Of course my quizative 3 year was ready with questions and why's. Here's our convo. Parents, how do/did you handle this talk with your kids? 

Mason: Why we do this?
Me: We are quite to show respect and sadness.
Mason: Why? 
Mr: Because on this day, years ago a bad man hurt Americans and the Heroes that were trying to help them in two very tall buildings called the World Trade Center. 
Mason: Heroes like superheroes?
Me: No, real life heroes like firemen, policemen, and the ambulance doctors. 
Madon: Why the bad man do that? 
Me: No one knows why there are bad people or why bad things happen. But know this bad man is gone and we pray for God's protection. 

He drew this picture and it is almost scary how accurate it is. He said it is of a "fire-hero" and the "world buildings".  He then tells me that he wants to take it to the firemen.  So before his AWANA class at church we stopped by the firehouse with donuts and Mason's picture. I am so proud of my little man.




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Tuesday, September 10, 2013

The difference between 22 & 32! Taylor Swift Parody.
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Well, not all my costumes can be winners! Bah ha ha 

He loved it. All that matters. 


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Monday, September 09, 2013

Just when you are taking life too seriously... they do this! :) Love them! 


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Growing up my parents always rented.  I have never lived in a home that either my family or myself have actually owned.  I think when you grow up in a lower income setting home ownership means more than having a huge material possession.  It means, I've succeeded in doing something for myself (and children) that my parents weren't able to provide.  When my husband and I decided that our first home buying experience would be building it wasn't scary at all because my husband has built homes for a living.  He no longer does so but we found a fantastic neighborhood and he felt the quality and upgrades the builder offered where above par.  

I was over the moon excited to build the home of my dreams.  Literally, a home of my own was only something dreams where made of until now.  The house we chose was amazing. It had every feature I had ever flagged in a magazine or pinned on Pinterest.  The neighborhood had a mature feel with mature gorgeous Carolina pines though it housed new construction.  It was a short walk from the small town's library, elementary school, and ball fields. Someone pinch me this dream come true is even better than the dream!

Flash forward....that dream was too good to be true. We signed a contract in March.  It's now September, the month we should have been closing on the house, and they just now cleared the lot.  There as been NO work done on the home.  We confirmed rumors that the builder is struggling and it's not looking good.  Homeowners that have already closed after a year of waiting for their homes are experiencing issues and cannot get the builder to fix them despite the 1 year warranty that comes with the homes.  Our dream home was becoming a nightmare and we decided to set emotions aside and do the smart thing and walk.  It sucks, it stings, and I'm very sad.  

We are walking away not only from drywall and concrete...we are walking away from the picture I had in my head of where we would put the Christmas tree, who would get what bedroom, how to set-up the playroom, the tree we picked out on the lot to build our kids a treehouse.  Needless to say, at this point, I'm crushed.

Our lease is still ending soon so we need to switch gears and we have decided to look at pre-existing construction.  We are in the process of terminating the contract, etc.  Soon we will start viewing homes.  I really hope that I don't compare each home to what our "dream home" would have had and I can find that excitement for home ownership again.  

So this is the ending of "Building of Our Love-Lee Home" and the beginning of "Searching for Our Love-Lee Home".
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