Sunday, June 26, 2005

The "Dead Zone"

I recently read a blog written by a single person expressing the difficulties of being single when it seems like all their friends have taken on bagged roles in their life, such as marriage or family. Upon contemplation of this I felt that someone should voice the difficulties of being in either a long term relationship, engagement, or the "cart before the horse scenario" children without marriage. When you are in such relationships / circumstances you are in what I like to call a "dead zone". Let me explain the reason behind my terminology. The "dead zone" is the social deprivment and isolation from your single friends and the lack of acceptance into the married domain. You are now on no one's social A-list except for other "dead zoners". Examples: 1.) Your single friends are planning a wild trip to Las Vegas filled with sleepless nights, drinks, and checking out the sites. Do you get an invite? No. They have already had visions of the trip in their head and decided your "dead zone" status would slow them down. They have decided for you that the trip would be inapropriate considering you have someone at home to worry about, whether it be a sig. other or a lil' one. 2.) A set of your married friends are entertaining; a backyard barbecue. Are you invited? Nah. They have decided for you that they would bore you with married / family talk. Even if you are planning to get married or have been with your sig. other for longer than they have been married themselves...there is no way you can possibly relate. So singles, at least your social group is large and endless with possibilities. Those of us in the "dead zone" are outcasts of both worlds.
(Photo above "Dead Zoners: My fiance and I")

1 comment:

todd said...

I feel the same way with singlehood. I think you just need to find more friends in the "dead zone", I don't have many single friends in my city, so those crazy weekends of debauchery are few and far between. I usually have to make a weekend to see the single friends in NY or LA or MIA and then go crazy. The rest of the time, it's going to the movies, or BBQs, or coffeeshops with the couples, who never have single friends to set me up with.